Menopause: It’s Just Hot Flushes and No Periods, Isn’t It?
Menopause, it’s just hot flushes and no periods, was what I understood it to be, even when I was perimenopausal, which I didn’t know I was or what it was.
My Background and Lack of Knowledge About Menopause
I was trained as a nurse, working in operating theatres for nearly 27 years, then left clinical practice ending up working in occupational health but I knew nothing about menopause.
I had heard of menopause, or ‘the change’, but didn’t really understand what it was. Well, no-one talked about it. Even in my late 40s, the General Practitioner (GP) I spoke to asked, ‘are you still having periods?’ I laughed and said unfortunately, she laughed and changed the subject. There was no discussion around this or that may happen, if you struggle to come back.
The First Symptoms of Menopause
The first hot flushes I experienced came on while I was sitting down in the theatre whilst waiting for the surgery to finish. All of a sudden, this heat started to rise from my feet, like a tap had been switched on. The heat slowly rose, over about 20 minutes, before dissipating. I sat there wondering what on earth was going on. It happened again each hour but just in the mornings for several days.
Trying to Manage Menopause Symptoms
As a good nurse, I spoke to Dr Google, who suggested taking Sage Extract. So, I trotted off to the health shop on my next day off, and started on the sage. The flushes stopped. I don’t know if it was the sage or that was all I was going to get. Anyway, I thought well that was easy, I’m nearly through it.
Perimenopause Symptoms Intensify
My periods then went erratic, stopping for months. There was me thinking, that was me all over and done with menopause!
But they kept returning with a vengeance, heavier, longer and more frequently. I didn’t see the point of talking to the GP. The last time I spoke to them about my periods, due to severe pain, they prescribed medication that didn’t work, so I just got on with it.
Over the next few years (yes, a few years), I experienced numerous symptoms, joint pain, frozen shoulders, anxiety, depression, hay fever, and changes to my bowel habits. Nothing made sense why. I put the anxiety and depression down to the pandemic. But what caused the loss of confidence? Why hay fever?
But I plodded on.
Discovering the Reality of Menopause
By this time, I had been doing Occupational Health assessments for a few years. Then during one assessment, I was talking to a lady, who made an off the cuff comment, ‘I’m really struggling with my menopause symptoms’, I thought to myself – how hard can it be? It’s only hot flushes and no periods. She started to describe where she was struggling, whilst I spoke to Dr Google again.
I found a website, and the number of symptoms, I was gobsmacked! I said to her Omg there are 34 symptoms! She replied Oh my gosh I didn’t know that either! I don’t recall what else I said to her but advised her to talk to her GP. After the call I patted myself on the back, thinking you did well there, as this was the first menopause case I had dealt with.
A few weeks later, another lady said the same thing. This time I said to myself great, I know a bit about this. I told her about the symptoms and gave her some general advice.
I then thought, there must be something to this menopause thing, I need to find out more. But never did it hit me; this could be what was going on with me!
Menopause Awareness and Learning More
By chance, our manager at the time emailed us with information on some menopause awareness sessions, so I eagerly signed up. I attended the sessions and the penny dropped. I was in perimenopause. This was why I was feeling like I did, eventually the symptoms I had been having made sense. That’s why I had struggled with my confidence in and out of work, plus everything else etc.
I arranged the call with the speaker and asked for advice, but not for myself, but for the ladies I help during my OH role. She offered me the opportunity to do her menopause champion course, which I jumped at! The topic was fascinating, and I just wanted to help women. I never considered getting help for myself, because I don’t ask for help, I’m independent!
Becoming a Menopause Coach
A few months later I was offered the opportunity to do her menopause coaching course. Again, I agreed straight away! I had not got a clue what menopause coach was or did. I just saw it as a way of helping other women, in my OH role!
I completed the 6 month diploma course, during which we were taught the trainers signature plan – The Menopause Plan, a 7 week programme, looking at normal daily activities to help reduce cortisol levels and improve / lessen menopause symptom intensity. We did the plan ourselves; I didn’t notice much myself, I don’t know if it was because my perimenopause was nearly over, or I didn’t really understand the point, but I carried on. We then had to take two practice clients through the 7-week plan.
Each week with the practice clients, I thought this can’t work, they are going to call me fit to burn for wasting 7 hours of their life!
But the response was amazing, the improvement in both women was fantastic. They both raved about how it had helped. I was gobsmacked, but so excited that I can now help others, knowing that small changes in normal daily activities can help. I now use the principles of the menopause plan when supporting women in my OH role as well as with private clients.
Since completing the coaching course, I am trying my best to raise awareness of Menopause online and in person. I want others to be able to understand what menopause is, so they can advocate for themselves. This is especially important when doctors are not routinely trained in menopause, so will fob off patients, saying they are too young ( you are never too young), or don’t put the symptoms together or don’t have the time to think about what is going on and just offer antidepressants.
Alternatives to HRT in Managing Menopause
The normal age of natural perimenopause is over 45 years old. Menopause (the day after you have not had a period for 12 consecutive months) average age is 51 in the UK. But symptoms can last into a womens 60s or 70s. No two women have the same number, combination or intensity of symptoms. Some sail through with no issues; others struggle to get through each day. However, perimenopause can happen at any age after puberty.
The younger the woman (under 40 years old) who is diagnosed (eventually) with Premature Ovarian Insufficiency (POI), the increased number of challenges, such as starting a family, explaining to a partner of their condition. That is after they are likely to have struggled to get a diagnosis, being told they are too young. Those with POI, need higher doses of hormone replacement therapy (HRT), so it mimics the natural levels of the hormones.
There is also the group of women, who experience sudden menopause – Surgical Menopause, when they have undergone a hysterectomy and removal of their ovaries. There is no slow glide into the symptoms, over months or years, it is a sudden hit. So, these ladies need more tailored medical support to ensure they receive the right amount of HRT.
The UK is losing 1 in 10 women going through menopause from the job market, due to the intensity of their symptoms, or feeling they can no longer manage their role. There are 1 in 4 who consider leaving or going part time. It upsets me to know that with support and a few adjustments, those women could remain in work. Added to this, unfortunately, a lot of women don’t always feel able or safe to advise their manager about their symptoms, so they just struggle onwards.
Yes, there is a financial cost if a company hires a menopause coach. But it’s nowhere near the amount it would cost to replace that member of staff, for a new staff member that has to be trained, and may not even stay in the role.
As well as the loss of women from the workforce impacting the economy. Menopause symptoms also affect all areas of the sufferer’s life, the ripple effect reaching their partners, children, friends, families and colleagues.
The rate of suicides in women increase.
The rate of suicide attempts in work increases.
The number of divorces increases.
The ripples reach far and wide, but if menopause was more in the open, men and doctors were more aware and supportive, these numbers could drop.
It upsets me that we reach perimenopause age and don’t know what it is and what is going on, or how to manage it. We talk about puberty, we know what to expect, we accept teenagers’ mood swings, but when it’s older women it’s kept quiet, hidden away. We need to bring it out in the open and normalise it, as yes, it is a normal transition.
When we go through puberty, the life stresses on us were minimal if we were lucky, but it was still hard. However, when we reach perimenopause especially if you are in the ‘normal age range’ you have more stressors than when you were a teen with working possibly full time, family & children responsibilities, pets, a home to manage, elderly parents etc.
Women tend to put others first, she forgets about herself, just carrying on, struggling to juggle twenty things at once, spinning all the plates. This sends them into chronic stress – a state of constant fight or flight. Sleep is impacted, they can’t lose weight, their mood becomes unstable, their appetite may be affected, they may live off caffeine, alcohol or nicotine and struggle to get regular exercise. I don’t have time, is said. However, all this makes the menopause symptoms worse.
Recent research showed that anxiety worsens hot flushes. The flush occurs, the stress increases, they worry, did anyone notice, when will it happen again, will it be bad, will I soak through my top? The increased stress, then makes the flush worse, which increases the anxiety and so on.
HRT is not always an option to manage menopause symptoms. Not everyone can take HRT, some may not want to, others may not find it effective. HRT is not a magic bullet, it is not a quick fix, and can take three months or longer to be effective. Sometimes there is a need to adjust the dose or application type ie; oral, patches or gel.
So having other options is important, which is where The Menopause Plan comes in as a comprehensive, holistic approach to help women to manage their stress, so they can lessen the intensity of their symptoms, and turn back their menopause, allowing them to feel better. The tidal wave effect of the symptoms on other people, changes to a gentle ripple as things calm down.
Coaching allows for women to have support, accountability and given encouragement throughout the plan. During which they set short term goals to help them improve on what they are already doing.
The Menopause Plan: A Holistic Approach
The 7 week Menopause Plan is based around normal activities of hydration, routine, diet, exercise, setting boundaries and asking for help, decluttering and celebrating successes. The financial outlay is purely for the plan, there are no expensive supplements that may not work to take, or the need to invest in expensive exercise machines, gym memberships etc, unless that is what they want to do.
There are no hidden fees in the cost of the programme, and only requires the individuals time. So, in 7 weeks, they have dialled back the intensity of their menopause symptoms. Having arrived on pleasure island and rediscovered themselves, finding they have left pain island behind them in the dust!
As a Menopause Coach, I use my Signature Framework – Rediscover Yourself in Menopause Framework as a basis for all my programmes. The pillars of Discovery – explaining what menopause is, what’s involved – hormones and symptoms. Lifestyle- the menopause plan, making small changes to daily activities. Future Planning – setting future goals, so they have something to work towards. Celebrating – looking at what they have achieved and how far they have come. I use the same framework for the training I offer, whether it’s an in person talk, virtual masterclass or workshop. All the programmes I offer are all based on the Menopause Plan.
When taking women through my programmes I encourage them to fill out a symptom tracker, at the start and end of the 7 week plan. This way they can actually see what improvement has been made, which reassures them it’s working but also encourages them to continue with the positive changes they have already made.
7-week Menopause Plan
The following scores are what one of my clients recorded at the start and end of the 7 week Menopause Plan.
Night sweats 6/10 down to 3/10
Poor sleep 7/10 down to 3/10
Concentration 7/10 down to 3/10.
Anxiety 6/10 down to 1/10.
If that doesn’t prove it works, I don’t know what will.
Back to me again, my biggest regret is that when I realised I was perimenopausal I didn’t reach out for help. I didn’t think there was any other option other than HRT, I didn’t think anything would work. How wrong I was! I now wish I had reached out, found and completed the Menopause Plan much earlier, and had worked with a Menopause Coach back then. If I did, who knows where I would be now.
My Advice on Managing Menopause
- If you are struggling with menopause symptoms, reach out for help. Don’t despair if your doctor doesn’t seem to want to help you. There is a Menopause Coach near you, who can.
- If you aren’t menopausal yet, get prepared, do some awareness training, so you can advocate for yourself when the time comes to get help.
- Prioritise time for you, allow your body to relax. Reducing your stress levels can help reduce your symptom intensity.
- Ensure you are fully hydrated. Being dehydrated causes stress, headaches and brain fog.
- Have a good sleep routine, sleep is needed to allow the body to relax and repair.
- Boost connections with friends, family or loved ones to boost your oxytocin levels and reduce your stress.
Julie Menopause Coach, is contactable via juliemenopausecoach@gmail.com
Facebook – Julie Menopause Coach.
Facebook Private Group – The Menopause Suite.
