The Power of Self-Love Practices for Inner Healing
In 2015, I hit rock bottom. I was in pain and despair.
Looking into the mirror I couldn’t believe the young healthy woman I once knew was disappearing in front of me. I didn’t recognise her any more.
I was confused, exhausted and frightened that the pain I was experiencing would define my existence.
Through my tears and pain one morning, I thought “if this is how my life is going to be, then I don’t want to be here”.
Comparing my appearance now to how it was prior to the event upset me.
When I suffered my stroke, the right side of my face drooped and it was difficult to put makeup on. I was always particular about my appearance and loved to dress up and look good, now I felt ugly and my once toned body was disappearing fast.
I was unable to perform my gym workouts and yoga.
Self-love and self-worth had definitely left the building. My marriage by then had sadly ended.
“Who will want me like this anyway?”
The Decision to Reclaim My Power
Despite the hard work, studying and running my own business and trying to move through each day living with chronic pain, doing volunteer work for the stroke association, working with adult and children’s hospices as a massage therapist, I still found it incredibly difficult to accept and love myself.
Then in 2015, the day I stopped giving my power away to everyone including the medical system, the day I decided I was worthy and deserved to be here in this beautiful world, the day I decided that I do matter, the day I decided to love myself and find another way to heal without prescribed medications, this was the first day on my self-love journey.
I could see that I wasn’t broken and that my body was amazing, it was doing all it could to adapt and survive.
I somehow dug deep and found this inner reservoir of understanding and began to like myself.
I befriended my body and started to love it and be grateful for all that it has been through.
Practicing radical self-compassion is the medicine we all need.
We all are beautiful just as we are; somehow we forget this because in this competitive society that we live in, we can distort how we feel about ourselves.
We often are looking for this positive self-evaluation in order to feel valued and worthy.
Scrolling through social media posts believing that someone is prettier, slimmer, healthier and wealthier than us.
“This kind of compulsive concern with I, me and mine isn’t the same as loving ourselves. Loving ourselves points us to capacities of resilience,compassion, and understanding within that are simply part of being alive.” – Sharon Salzburg, The Force of Kindness
You are enough just as you are. Self love starts from within, it’s not about seeking love on the outside.
Know your worth and stop comparing yourself to others, make a commitment to love how you feel inside deep at your core, that’s what matters.
This is a beautiful act of radical self-compassion by accepting who you are.
Take the time to go on your own self-love journey, look within to heal yourself – this is the art of self love, one step, one day at a time. The more you love yourself the more confident, happy and grateful you will become and this radiates out into your life and to everyone you meet.
Self-love is more effective than self-criticism let the driving force be love not fear.
It’s time to be kinder to yourself. Raise the bar of kindness for yourself.
Can you be softer with yourself?
Consider if you went through something massive and traumatizing,being tough on yourself is not going to help your journey to self-love. Self-love = healing.
Kindness is soft, criticism is hard.
How often do we praise our friend’s but criticize ourselves?
Imagine a child or friend going through a tough situation, how would you talk to them?
What tone of voice would you use?
And what would you say?
Practical Steps to Foster Self-Love
1: Practice now by talking to yourself in the same way:
I like to close my eyes and place my hand over my heart as I do this, helping to connect with my inner child ( we all have one, she’s listening).
2: Self love journal:
Write down 3 things you like about yourself daily.
If you find this difficult to do, try one a day and by the end of the week you will have 7.
3: Positive self talk:
Look in the mirror, your mirror is your best friend.
Repeat “I am worthy, I am enough, I love myself, I am beautiful inside and out. Morning and Evening.
4: Boundaries:
It’s so important to have healthy boundaries. boundaries indicate respect for yourself which translates to loving yourself, it’s a beautiful act of self-love and everyone will benefit in return.
5: Date with yourself:
Make space in your diary every week just for you, make it into a weekly ritual.
How would that look?
What does your ritual look like?
Perhaps sitting in the garden with your favourite drink, journalling, meditating or reading a book, dancing to your favourite tunes, eating cake or chocolate or both?
Make it fun, make it joyful, make your time matter. This is the art of self-love.
‘The most powerful relationship you can have is with yourself make it a loving one’
About the Author
Name: Nikki Hillhouse
Professional Title: Mindset and Therapeutic Coach
Bio: Nikki is an experienced Meditation teacher, Mind Detox practitioner, Therapeutic coach and Retreat facilitator. With an extensive background in holistic health. Nikki’s mission is to help and empower others to overcome their most challenging obstacles. Enabling you to reconnect with your authentic self- transcend your fears to live your best life ‘fully and completely’.
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