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Scheduling a Breakdown (Yes Really) To Change Your Life
Have you ever felt like you needed a control+alt+delete on your life?
I definitely did.
Professionally, I enjoyed a successful career as a Silicon Valley business executive advising fast moving companies as they inspire the world with innovation.
Personally, life wasn’t so rosy.
On the outside my life looked perfect – nice family, nice cars, nice home, nice clothes, nice purses, fun vacations and lots of smiles posted on social media.
I was winning at the game of life. If I was in a giant football stadium, the big monitors over the field would be flashing in bold caps “YOU ARE KILLING IT.” Problem is, I was not only killing it. It was killing me.
None of my checklists, none of my to-do lists, and none of the activities or people that were filling my life were making me happy. I was exhausted, depleted, sad, unhealthy and just dragging myself through my days.
So I did the only thing I knew how to do as a busy, overachieving, type-a personality.
I scheduled a breakdown.
I couldn’t keep going at the frenetic pace that I was accustomed to. I needed to slow down. I needed to take a break. I needed to find myself again.
Problem was I didn’t have time to slow down and to be honest, I didn’t really know what it meant to slow down. But I was determined to find out.
I also did not have the luxury of dropping everything and flying off somewhere exotic to find myself like Italy, India and Indonesia like Elizabeth Gilbert did in Eat Pray Love. I mean who wouldn’t want to search for their soul while eating mounds of pasta or while sipping frosty beverages on a sandy beach? But that wasn’t my reality. I had a young child at home and I was determined to find myself with her by my side.
I decided to take four weeks off work and instead of filling my days with meetings, powerpoints and financial spreadsheets, I decided to fill it with things I longed to do but never quite had the time for – journaling at the coffee shop, painting with an instructor, going to yoga in the middle of the day, learning to meditate, and more. All of this while my daughter was at school. I wanted to leave all the rushing around, all the hecticness of my days, and find solace in just doing things that were grounding, creative and enjoyable to my soul. I wanted to just be home, highly present and engaged with my family, without the backdrop of more work to do, more plans to make, more stress to tend to.
And as I did, the most miraculous thing happened. The insights, the epiphanies, the a-ha moments, the soul sparks that I needed to change my life came to the forefront.
From the breakdown came the most incredible breakthroughs.
These breakthroughs, one after the other, led to the most incredible insights and aligned actions that changed my life for the better.
Learn more about my journey in my book Hello Universe, It’s Me; How I Scheduled a Breakdown, Manifested a New Life (and how you can too).