Overcoming Ageism and Embracing New Opportunities
I remember my first boss telling me as a young teacher, “Lass you move after five years, you only grow when you move.” I did move every 6 years; the opportunities came along, and l gained knowledge and skills in every challenge I took. I wish he had told me about ageism, the hurdle you face as you progress through life.
At 59, I found myself in a new province, ready to marry a new husband and with a lot of life left in me. The reality of being sixty stared at me in the face. How did this happen so fast? I had transferred to a company that I was working for in Gauteng, but six months down the line I realized that it was not nourishing my soul. The company’s values and non-negotiables did not line up with who I was, my values and for what I was prepared to trade my time. I drew the line. I was no longer formally “employed”.
The scene had changed
Soon I realized that my unemployed status was not as easy to resolve. The potential employers in my new town did not know me. I had no credibility in this new community. I applied for the jobs I knew but was not the successful candidate. I had always been a successful candidate. So many thoughts went through my head….
- Was it Age bias? – Did companies see the grey hair and question possible technological limitations. Was a younger candidate a better long-term option?
- Local Network? The professional relationships I had in my previous province would have secured me job opportunities even if they were locums. I had a reputation and professional associations. People saw my skill and talent.
- Industry Preferences? I wondered if they were worried about my energy levels, salary expectations.
The panic I felt when I recognized my obvious hurdles and unemployment status, recognized my internal dialogue and limiting thoughts that put me into survival mode, was terrifying. I had to figure out a workable plan. I still needed to make an income for five years according to my financial advisor or I would not have the option of scone with cream, along with my cappuccino at 70.
I Had to Do Something – I Was A Problem Solver
I started networking, joined the local NPO Keep Plett Clean, I picked up litter and helped with the NPO management and marketing. I helped with the local elections 2024 and managed the voting station. I loved working with the people in the team. I joined a coffee club and met dear friends. Through this club I connected with another coach and started doing a bit of contract work. I knew what my passion was.
I had always been good at leveraging my online presence but suddenly I changed direction and now I had to find my market for the niche I chose. I realized I could be the “master of my fate” as William Henly put it in Invictus, “The captain of my soul”. I saw my passion, my vision board, and my dream. Next was to lose self-doubt. I almost bought into ‘I am too old’…. If I were to continue living a full life, I would have the opportunity here to take the reins. As Surinder Kumar said, “Everything you need is within you.”
I am building that dream; no, I am not crocheting or gardening. I can if I want to and drink tea with no scone. But for now, I am excited to do something where every ounce of myself is excited.
My Non-Negotiables
Three things keep me going and drive me to make this last chapter the most exciting of my journey through life.
- My identity in Christ.
As my highest value, spirituality directs me to make decisions about what I do to serve people. I am there to contribute to the lives of others, to inspire and encourage and to enable people to recognize their ultimate God-given purpose.
- My vision for my life.
All these years I have worked hard, now the genius is within me. I will use my talents and experience and show others how to live a fulfilled life looking after a family and building a life that serves them.
- My ability to recognize my own weakness.
I have had to build again, and the fear of failure almost crippled me and destroyed my dream because success is for a certain group of people. The comparison to phenomenally successful and accomplished experts challenged my own story and made me sadly regret, even for a short while, the choices I made. I am exactly where I should be. I almost succumbed to inactivity, to accepting the stereotypes and lies served by society regarding ageism. I will keep track in tough times and work on the skills I need to make a success of this last chapter.
I will survive….
What I have since then recognized is the importance of the following three things. No one can take away the self-worth you hold and the confidence you have in your own abilities, except you. It always starts with a thought and only you can make the next chapter matter. Doing nothing, or too little is the obstacle that will define the course of your journey. You make the choice. Finally, there is always someone that needs your help. As Confucius says, being in a room and being the cleverest person there is the wrong place to be. I will continue learning, so should you.
About the Author
Name: Karin Gemmeken
Professional Title: Business Coach
Bio: As a business coach and trainer I help clients make the most of the chapter they are navigating. I have worked with teams at BMW, Woolworths, Hollard, Interfile, Itoo and Tigerbrands. I am a passionate life-long learner making the most of all the opportunities given to me.
