Healing Through Animals: The Beginning of a Transformational Journey
The first time I saw her, she stood alone, by a worn split rail fence. She rocked back and forth, in an aimless rhythm, and licked the dark wooden plank with her pink tongue.
Lola, named so by the stable manager, was a nine-year-old Arab mare. Lola’s official name was Al-Anood. It had a few different meanings in Arabic: “The girl who has a strong personality, high self-confidence, and popularity”, and “Brave, Strong and Courageous”. She was anything but confident, brave, or strong the day I first approached her, in the hot desert sun. I didn’t know then how the true meaning of her name would shape both of our lives.
Lola had a short, but remarkable Endurance Racing career. She performed well and accomplished great results. Retiring early and getting pregnant was her reward. Giving birth to a valuable offspring was considered her greatest honor and legacy. She didn’t deliver. She was discarded as brood mare and sent to auction. Often, going to the auction meant an entry into the slaughter line. Was this all there was to Al-Anood’s years of loyal service and performances?
Fate would have it that a woman bought Al-Anood at the auction, but was unable to keep her, and instead donated her to the ranch I volunteered at in the Dubai desert. I helped run the Saturday “Gecko Club” which was an umbrella for pony/goat/duck/camel activities, in exchange for the occasional leisure horse ride in the desert. It provided me calmness from a stressful career full of travel and long hours.
My Own Journey: Lost in the Corporate World
For two decades I climbed corporate ladders, shattered several glass ceilings, and performed above expectations. I was dedicated and chased something I was convinced was worth the chase. I wielded an almost masculine power, in my quest to compete in a male-dominated industry. But insecurity simmered under the accolades. I dampened my femininity in order to show up and be taken seriously. I did more to be more, and the fear of not being enough, of being judged or rejected, was ever present. I pursued perfectionism. As a working mother, I was vulnerable and split between my family, my kids, and my demanding corporate career. There was no perfection or authenticity in either role. Guilt weighed in daily. Grief over the loss of family time overpowered me. A corporate restructure and new management who did not need my team or me, sealed my fate. I was discarded, headed for “auction”, and had to decide whether to continue to pursue a toxic corporate career or apply all my strengths to something else. I did not expect a horse to guide me towards a transformative decision.
While Lola continued to rock her thin body side to side and lick the wooden fence, I stood by her side and stroked her neck. She did not interact with me. Her eyes were empty and lifeless. A soft, warm breeze blew into her long grey mane. I buried my head in the coarse hair and breathed in her smell. Her sad state resonated with me. My disappointment over the forced job loss sent a wave of sadness. Over the next few months, I spent every day with Lola. We walked for miles around the oasis at the ranch, and she grazed in the shadows of the date palms. We asked nothing, nor expected nothing, from each other. Lola built muscles and strength. Life returned to her eyes. A deep connection formed. Trust built out of our shared vulnerability. I decided to become her owner. This mare deserved more.
A New Path: Coaching Through Connection
Lola played a huge role in my decision, 14 years ago, to launch my own coaching practice. She infused me with courage and trust I needed to empower other women with similar career and life challenges. We rescued each other. Together we became “Brave, Strong and Courageous”, like her Arabic name.
Being in the presence of a horse can be transformational. I see this every time I work with clients, who spend time with my horse. In this transformation, vulnerability plays a huge role. Standing next to a 1000-pound animal, who looks straight into your soul, takes courage. There is no need for “perfection”, with a horse. Horses only seek authentic connections. Vulnerability can be scary, because we fear that others may judge us, hurt us, see us as weak, and ridicule us. But vulnerability can also be a powerful source of strength and a space of openness where we receive everything we desire, without judgment. If you seek authenticity through transformation, I invite you to reach out here.
About the Author
Name: Pia Ault
Professional Title: Executive Leadership Coach and Equine Assisted Coaching Practitioner
Bio: Pia is a highly skilled Executive Coach with a passion for guiding women who desire a stronger confidence, presence, and identity. As an emotions and empathy expert, Pia helps individuals identify and expand their emotional vocabulary, expressing themselves, and living with their emotions in a healthier way.
Website: www.caballusconsulting.com
