I had the job, the recognition, and the “right” life on paper, so why did I feel so far from myself?
As I got closer to my 40th birthday, I slowed down and took a proper look at my life.
From the outside, everything seemed fine. I had a stable role with a national company, a supportive network, and achievements I’d worked hard for. The kind of life people call “sorted”.
But inside, I felt flat. Not falling apart, just quietly disconnected. Like I’d built a version of success that looked right to everyone else… but that didn’t feel right to me.
The truth about misalignment
For years, I thought success was the goal. Climb the ladder. Get the title. Be recognised. Tick the boxes.
And I did those things, yet I kept hearing the same question in my head: Is this it?
That’s when it hit me: sometimes you’re not unhappy because you’re doing life wrong. You’re unhappy because you’re living out of alignment.
– When your values and your day-to-day reality don’t match, it creates a tension you can’t ignore forever.
– You can still perform. You can still achieve. But it feels heavy, like you’re constantly pushing uphill.
Three questions that changed my direction
I didn’t need another strategy. I needed honesty.
So I asked myself three questions, questions I now encourage every woman to ask when she feels stuck, tired, or disconnected:
1. What truly matters to me?
2. Do my actions reflect my values?
3. What would my ideal outcome look like – if I stopped worrying about what looks impressive?
Those questions sound simple. They’re not. Because if you answer them properly, you can’t unsee what you’ve been tolerating.
And the truth for me was clear: I wanted purpose. The kind that feels like you’re building something that matters and not just performing a role.
The leap that opened my eyes
That clarity led me to leave corporate and work in a nonprofit funded by Coca-Cola.
It was eye-opening. The nonprofit focused on startups, and I met so many brilliant women with drive and potential. But what I noticed stayed with me:
– Even women who were already doing well still felt lost inside their business.
– They weren’t lacking ideas. They weren’t lazy. They weren’t “behind”. They were carrying a level of pressure that strategies and templates couldn’t fix.
Yes, practical tools matter. But many women needed deeper support: confidence, emotional intelligence, clarity, boundaries, and the ability to lead themselves through growth.
Research backs up what many of us feel: when people experience a stronger sense of purpose, it influences engagement and the way they show up in their work.
Why I built MDA Business Coaching
That gap is what led me to create MDA Business Coaching.
I didn’t want to build a business that simply gave women more to do. I wanted to help women become the kind of leader who can hold the growth she’s asking for.
– Because growth isn’t only about sales. It’s about capacity. Consistency. Standards. Decision-making. Who you become while you build.
That’s why we created support at different levels, because not every woman needs the same thing at the same time:
– LIMITLESS (our free community): because building a business can feel lonely, and it shouldn’t.
– DIY programmes like Blueprint Alignment and 90-Day Sprint: for women who want structure and momentum at their own pace.
– Group coaching: for support, accountability, and growth in community.
– VIP 1:1: for deeper, personalised transformation.
It’s not about doing more. It’s about doing what fits and what’s sustainable.
The missing ingredient: connection
One of the biggest shifts I’ve seen in women is what happens when they stop trying to do it all alone.
Connection isn’t “extra”. It’s part of the foundation. And it matters beyond business too: one of the longest-running studies on adult wellbeing points to relationships as a key driver of long-term health and happiness.
That doesn’t mean you need more people around you. It means you need the right people, those who help you stay honest, grounded, and brave.
A new chapter: our June retreat
This June, I’m partnering with Success Psychology to host a luxury retreat for women who are ready to reset: mentally, emotionally, and professionally.
Not to “escape life”, but to return to it with clarity. To slow down, reflect on what’s working (and what isn’t), and walk away with psychological tools that support alignment – so your results become easier to create and easier to sustain.
If you’re feeling lost, start here
If you’ve achieved things but still feel “off”, here’s a simple place to start.
Take 10 minutes and write down:
– What matters most to me right now?
– Where am I out of alignment?
– What’s one small action I can take in the next 24 hours that brings me back to myself?
Not ten actions. One.
Action Step: Alignment isn’t a big speech. It’s a decision you practise.
And if you’re in a season where you’re questioning everything, please hear this:
You’re not ungrateful. You’re not failing. You’re being called into the next version of you.
That’s where purpose begins.
Name: Michelle De Almeida
Professional Title: Global Speaker | #1 Amazon Bestselling Author | Award-winning Business Coach | Multi-business Entrepreneur | Founder & Ceo Of Almeida Investments | Property Investor & Developer
Bio: Michelle De Almeida is a business coach and founder of MDA Business Coaching, dedicated to empowering women entrepreneurs and building a supportive community through initiatives like LIMITLESS. With a focus on emotional intelligence, confidence, and collaboration, she helps women strengthen their mindset, lead with clarity, and thrive in both business and life.
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